A man’s estranged daughter wishes to reconcile with him after 10 years. But his wife firmly believes something is amiss and demands he take a paternity test before proceeding with their reunion.
A woman was hellbent on getting a paternity test done on her husband’s long-lost daughter and narrated her interesting dilemma on Reddit, citing, “My gut feeling has always said I’m not quite sure she’s his.”
When Redditor cat1416 met her husband around 11 years ago, she chanced upon his 2-year-old daughter from his short-lived love affair with his ex. On seeing the girl, the woman fixed it in her mind that she wasn’t her husband’s and was unsure why she felt this way.
Wife demands her husband take a paternity test | Photo: Flickr
Despite knowing very little about her husband’s previous relationship, the Original Poster (OP) was conscious of the rift her doubt regarding the child’s paternity would spark. Still, she braved it all and expressed her suspicion.
Before meeting OP, her boyfriend had known the child’s mother briefly. He broke up with her while pregnant due to her bipolar disorder. He spent the next three years back and forth in court trying to get contact.
However, his ex-girlfriend constantly turned down his approach and had even sent legal notices to cut contact. Meanwhile, the man’s mother and some family members expressed their doubts about whether his ex was carrying his child.
OP expressed her doubts regarding her husband’s daughter | Photo: Pexels
The situation worsened with time, and he ventured into a stage where he bought a DNA testing kit intending to test his pregnant ex the next time she visited him.
The ugly spat between them turned bitter when the woman accused OP. Not wanting to let his newfound relationship suffer damage, the man decided to give up fighting in court to maintain contact with her ex for their child.
He wrote a few letters to his ex and grandmother mentioning he was still interested in seeing his daughter but through an amicable arrangement and not through legal intervention. Eventually, the ex-girlfriend moved out of the area with the girl.
The man’s ex moved out of the area with her daughter | Photo: Unsplash
Later, the woman had a second child and even underwent a paternity test after the alleged father doubted her of infidelity. OP and her husband never heard from her again, but a familiar face reentered their lives ten years later.
Some people advised OP that letting the girl live with them without DNA testing could potentially backfire.
The man’s 13-year-old daughter moved back into the area to live with her grandparents. She put her best foot forward to reconcile with her dad a week later. But OP still had her doubts and demanded that he take a DNA test before things intensified between them.
The estranged daughter contacted OP’s husband | Photo: Unsplash
Her husband met his daughter and returned home with more than a smiling face. He told her the girl was lovely and yearned to meet the rest of the family.
After pondering deeply about her children from her previous marriage and the child with him, OP decided not to let that happen until he got the paternity test done with clear-cut results confirming he was the girl’s father.
OP’s husband was oversensitive to her demand. He clarified that the girl resembled him, making it evident she was his, and blamed her for pushing him for a test years ago though he was reluctant. Aware of where this was heading, OP voiced another big statement her husband had dared to dream.
OP’s husband argued with her & was firm the girl is his daughter | Photo: Pexels
She told him she wouldn’t let the girl move in with them if that’s what he wanted until he got the paternity results revealing she was his.
Posting to Reddit, she requested people to advise her if she was wrong for listening to her gut feeling instead of supporting her husband’s reconciliation with his estranged daughter.
Along with an overwhelming response, she received some warning signals too. Some people advised that letting the girl live with them without DNA testing could potentially backfire.
OP is unmoved and is hellbent about the DNA test | Photo: Pexels
“What happens if they take her in, and then the drama llama birth mom decides to stir up some more trouble and announces she IS NOT HIS?” Redditor ZebraElla stated, adding:
“What happens if, in 18 months, another potential father claims paternity and tries to sue them for custody? They sound like lovely people who may well choose to support her anyway.”
Meanwhile, user Valkrhae emphasized if OP’s husband would be willing to give up the girl even if she wasn’t his, hinting at the potential red flags on the way.
People on Reddit adviced OP on the legal consequences | Photo: Pexels
“The only issue with that would be if he was still willing to give her up even if she wasn’t his… I fear OP’s going to have to prepare herself to stand by her ultimatum,” the person said.
“If the DNA test came back and she wasn’t biologically his, but he still wanted to be a part of her life, I actually wouldn’t mind,” OP explained.
As the discussion warmed up, several users suggested a DNA test would be great before emotions and finances are involved.
“You might tell him that you think he should consider getting the test so the two of you can prepare your finances to support her better if she actually is his child,” user teresajs stated.
Some claimed DNA testing might help OP & her husband prepare for the girl’s finances | Photo: Pexels
Though OP’s husband wished to do a paternity test on his daughter for the past ten years, she claimed he’d likely changed his mind after meeting the girl.
“I earn a lot more than my husband does, and if I’m going to help financially support a child, I want to know she’s actually biologically related to him,” OP said.
OP is confident about getting an accurate picture of the girl’s genetic relation with her husband | Photo: Unsplash
Should the tests reveal the girl isn’t her husband’s, would OP still embrace her?
OP said she wanted her husband to do the paternity test to clear the air to support the child wholeheartedly. If the DNA results turn up negative, it’s anybody’s guess if she would still accept the girl, considering the many pieces of advice from people about how the girl’s birth father might show up someday and sue them for custody.
Will OP accept the girl even if her husband is hellbent on not doing the paternity test?
The uncertainty around the girl’s paternal roots has made OP firm with her decision not to navigate further without the test reports. While some people argued OP shouldn’t pressure her husband into taking the test, some claimed she still needed to push for the DNA test considering practical and legal reasons. Do you think the husband would succeed in persuading OP to agree to adoption even if the results were negative?
If you loved reading this story, then you might want to take a look at this one about how a heartbroken widower takes a paternity test after reading his late wife’s last letter.
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