A 19-year-old boy grew up suspecting he was an adopted child because he didn’t resemble anyone in his family. He secretly took a DNA test and confronted his parents with the results.
For years, Redditor 02LetterJenny lived with the suspicion that his current parents may have adopted him. He was around nine when he first asked them about this as he sensed something was amiss.
Years later, he secretly took a DNA test and later revealed the results to them. They were shocked and eventually confessed something he never dared to dream.
OP took a DNA test behind his parents’ back | Photo: Flickr
The Original Poster (OP) grew up knowing he didn’t resemble anyone from his family. He felt he was a misfit, and the constant questions people asked him added to his frustration. Posting his harrowing experience on Reddit, he stated:
“People outside my family constantly asked if I was adopted or if one of my parents was actually a stepparent.”
Whenever he talked to his parents about it, they downright dismissed his claims and said he was their biological son. However, he was unmoved by their words.
OP was frustrated not knowing his ancestral roots | Photo: Pexels
At times, he even thought he was switched at birth. But his parents made him feel guilty for thinking this way. He added:
“I spent years confused about why I felt so out of place…It bugged me so much, and for so long, I did an ancestry DNA test.”
The results declared him a mismatch with regards to his family’s ethnic background. OP knew the DNA test results didn’t make solid evidence by itself, but he thought it was enough to confront his parents.
OP thought he could’ve been switched at birth | Photo: Unsplash
“I felt I could go to my parents and slightly exaggerate the amount of evidence I had to get some answers maybe finally,” he explained.
OP was hurt by how his parents intentionally hid his identity for years.
OP approached his mom and told her about the DNA test. Eventually, his dad came to know, and both his parents were enraged.. They claimed he didn’t trust them, but he was stubborn in getting them to tell the truth.
OP’s parents were furious with him | Photo: Pexels
“Then finally I was told I’m adopted, at age 19, a decade after I first asked,” OP stated, and claimed his parents refused to disclose the details about his birth parents beyond claiming they were both dead.
OP then turned to social media for advice if he was wrong for taking the test and confronting his adoptive parents about it. While several people sympathized with him, user bbn0305 commented:
“My daughter is five and has known all along that she’s adopted. Our goal is for her never to remember the day she figured it out. We want it to be something she’s always known. It was not fair what they did to you.”
OP doubted his parents’ claims | Photo: Unsplash
Redditor New-Affect2549 said she had a similar stressful experience when she found out she’d been adopted. She wrote:
“The same thing happened to me. I was seven months pregnant and 18. Everyone in the entire town knew and lied to my face. And they wonder why I have trust issues. I felt so betrayed.”
Meanwhile, user SKrivvaCat asked OP in a comment that read: “I honestly would consider this enough to go no contact. Are you in a position where you can cut them out of your life?”
One person revealed she was seven months pregnant when she found out about her adoption | Photo: Pexels
“No, I live with them, and I haven’t been able to work because of a health issue. So I don’t have the money to move out,” OP responded.
User Garden_Disastrous said he was 33 when he found out he was adopted. “It was awful, and I’m still trying to work through the trauma. I just wanted you to know you are not alone,” he stated.
Experts like Dr. Steven Nickman suggest children need to know about their adoption between ages 6 and 8 and that waiting until adolescence isn’t advised. “Disclosure at that time can be devastating to children’s self-esteem and their faith in their parents,” he says.
OP still lived with his adoptive parents as he couldn’t move out due to a health issue | Photo: Unsplash
OP was hurt by how his parents intentionally hid his identity for years. “I’m an adult, and after years of struggling with my identity and having a false family medical history, I’d like to seek answers about my roots and my medical information,” he stated.
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